Friday, September 30, 2011

More Happy Hilbert Car Ride Conversation

Josh: What country do you think has the most technology?
Nate: California.
Chloe: California is a state.
Josh: Like Illinois. (pronounce Illi Noise)
Me: Josh, it’s Illinois. It rhymes with annoy.
Josh: Oh. Really? Well, good thing it’s not a country. It’s small. Someone would take us over. What is the biggest country?
Me: I’m not sure.
Josh: Is Russia pretty big?
Nate: They call it Russia because they rush around because it's so big.
Josh:  We own England, don’t we?
Me: Uh. No. Why do you think that?
Josh: Isn’t that what General Washington was fighting for?
Nate: Wait. California is a state?

Nate: I want to be an actor. In movies.
Josh: I want to be in the army. They get to use guns.
Chloe: Really, Josh?
Josh: It fulfills my dream of blowing things up. They’ve got to do a lot of pushups. And they don’t get good food. Nevermind. I don't want to do that.

Tuesday, September 13, 2011

Just a Typical Happy Hilbert Car Ride

(Heard inside the Happy Hilbert Minivan during one twenty minute drive home from church.)

Josh: Chloe, what do you want to be when you grow up?
Chloe: I’m not sure.
Nate: I want to be a male model.
Josh: Hey! That’s what I want to be.

Josh:  Sheesh. Everywhere we go, everyone knows me.
Nate: Me, too.
Josh: They say that my mom talks about me all the time or they know my mom or something.
Chloe: That’s because mom is a social butterfly.
Josh: Yeah, she’ll talk to anyone.
Me: I used to be shy when I was your age. I didn’t talk very much.
Josh: That can’t be right.

Nate: Are we on the internet?
Chloe: Sometimes mom blogs.
Josh: And, of course, we’re famous on Facebook.

Josh:  I hate flies. What do flies do?
Me: Uh, fly?
Josh: No, what are they good for?
Me: Frogs eat them.
Nate: What are frogs good for?
Me: Birds eat them.
Josh: What are birds good for?
Me: They spread around seeds.
Nate: Oh. That’s what flies are good for.


Me: Any chance you guys could settle down and be quiet for a few minutes?
Josh: But, what should we do?
Me: Anything that’s not loud. How about quietly pray?
Josh: Mom, you’re so funny.

Taco Bell drive thru guy:  Why aren’t you kids in school?
Me: We homeschool.
TBG: You’re not at home.
Me:  Well, we’ve got to eat.
TBG: You should have home ec and cook.
Me: Uh. Good idea. We’ll do that tomorrow. Today, we’re having Taco Bell.
TBG: (to Chloe) Quick! What’s ten times ten?
Chloe: um. A hundred.
TBG: See. Now you learned something today.